Letting Go

As I flew back to my summer home of London, from a week-long excursion that ended in Rome, my hand couldn't write fast enough in my little black moleskine that had become my summer's salavation. I promised I would stop being afraid of letting people see what I feel and the idea of writing a blog about my life's experiences came up.
Fear has driven me here.

I used to believe that everything worth reading needed to have verve, significance and some detailed explanation of a philosophical concept, in order to be written. I have been praised just as much as I have been criticized and I believe I have deserved both. Writing is enchanting to me, words have spoken to me in a way that no person ever could, and they have shown me dreams and dreamers that awaken my soul to what the world sometimes leads me away from.

My best friend is strong, she is beautiful and she is one of the only people in my life that instead of taking my word for it- can see through my excuses and turn my fears into dreams again.
It's like magic.
I imagine that is the only way it is supposed to be, friendship.
I know that I am lucky, I will be the first to admit it, bask in it, and give thanks to all that i've been given. Everyone that I've been given.
With luck all you can do is say thank you and be grateful that it's what you have. People can resent your luck, try to belittle your gifts, but in the end all you can do is make it, and acknowledge what you've been given.
I'm not going to say that it's from some God, but I'm also not going to say that it's not.

Personally, I believe in Karma, but that doesn't mean that's what it is.

I also believe it is work. Relationships,Success,Happiness. It's work and it's tedious and giving yourself up to the work could be the best thing you ever do. I'm good at relationships, I know how to give, I know how to take and I know how to share. Success is yet to be determined. As far as happiness, I am good at being happy. I forget sometimes, but most days I am once again lucky enough to be a dreamer, optimist and hopeful.

So here I am, finally pushed over the edge by honest words that make me feel like I can grow. That remind me to not be afraid of what I'll change into and who I'll become.
To not fear the loss of something I love, through the changing of method, or circumstance.

I can tell that I have a long way to go, but for me, this has been a small step toward success.